This is Part Three of My Journey Home To Myself — A Four-Part Story. Before moving forward, don’t forget to read both Part One and Part Two.
The Big Leap
In my early 20s, I had meticulously crafted a plan for myself, and I was determinedly ticking off each milestone.
— Attend an Ivy League school (check!)
— Work at a hypergrowth tech startup in Silicon Valley (check!)
— Get my MBA at Stanford or Harvard
— Break into venture capital
— Achieve financial success
— Get married by 30
— Buy a beautiful home, a nice car, and designer clothes
— Travel luxuriously
While scaling a hypergrowth tech startup and studying for the GMAT in every spare moment, a thought crossed my mind: “I wonder if I can land a job in venture capital without an MBA from Stanford or Harvard.”
So, true to form, I created a plan and began executing it.
After a stint living in Venice with my ex, I had fallen in love with the area and added it to my list of potential destinations.
Fueled by this vision, I compiled a comprehensive list of every well-known venture capital fund and studio in New York, San Francisco, and Los Angeles. I reached out to investors and partners I admired via LinkedIn, Twitter, and Instagram, set up meetings, and pursued introductions wherever possible.
For nearly all of 2020, I persistently applied to the few venture capital positions that became available. I had fascinating conversations, advanced through interviews, and occasionally made it to the final stages—only to face rejection time and time again.
I was competing against hundreds of other applicants, most of whom were fresh graduates of elite MBA programs like Stanford and Harvard.
And yet, I persisted.
During this same period, a quiet inner voice was urging me to explore a different path.
I found myself considering enrolling in a nutrition course to become certified as a Holistic Health Coach. It felt like a calling—something deeply aligned with my personal interests and values.
But I pushed that voice aside, convincing myself it wasn’t practical or aligned with the plan I had meticulously crafted. The version of me that thrived on achievement and external validation just wasn’t ready to entertain such a dramatic shift.
Finally, in November 2020, after months of effort, I landed what I thought was my dream job—Chief of Staff at a reputable seed-stage fund in Venice, California. Out of 550+ applicants, I was the one they chose.
I was absolutely elated.
I packed up my life, moved out of my New York apartment at the end of November, secured a new place in the heart of Venice, shipped my belongings, and headed back to Canada to spend the holidays with my family for about four weeks before starting this exciting new chapter.
But, just one day after starting the job remotely from Mont-Tremblant, Canada, on January 4, 2021, I quit.
So, what changed in such a short amount of time?
Over this four-week holiday period, I took some much-needed time to reflect. I was about to begin my new dream job, but a gnawing feeling told me that something was completely off.
As you know very well, health and wellness had been my true passions for as long as I could remember.
But for many, many years, I suppressed my desire to turn this passion into a career.
It didn’t feel “viable”.
As an Ivy League graduate and self-proclaimed overachiever, I believed that success had to look a certain way to earn approval, validation, and love.
But the more I followed this meticulously crafted plan, the more unhappy and misaligned I became—and the greater the pressure I experienced.
Life felt harder and harder.
Why?
Because I was living for everyone else’s expectations of me—not for myself.
This realization hit me on New Year’s Day in 2021 during a three-hour coaching session with a fear coach—Ben Harris.
I had listened to him on a podcast at the end of December and knew immediately that I needed to have a session with him as soon as possible.
During this session, I realized I was paralyzed by the fear of the unknown and deeply influenced by societal and external expectations of what my life should look like.
But, after several important conversations, one truth became crystal clear—the people who truly cared about me would love me no matter which path I chose.
That session taught me a powerful lesson—fear is a compass.
It often points to exactly where we need to go to grow, transform, and align with our authentic selves.
I asked myself some of the most potent questions, like:
– What genuinely lights me up and makes me excited?
– If I were to die tomorrow, how would I want to be remembered?
– Am I living in alignment with my true desires, doing what I want to be doing?
So, I took the leap.
I quit my dream job in venture capital to pursue the passion I had suppressed for nearly a decade—with absolutely no plan at all.
The Awakening
I’d love to tell you that I quickly built my dream life after taking this leap, but that couldn’t be further from the truth.
I entered my Saturn Return and began the most profound metamorphosis of my entire life.
2021 broke me down in ways I never thought possible.
— I wasn’t making any money, even though I finally enrolled in a 6-month accelerated nutrition program—the Institute for Integrative Nutrition.
— I gave up my lease in Venice, shipped all of my belongings back to Montreal to put them in storage (where they would remain for three years), and moved back to Canada to live at my parents’ homes for the entire year.
— I dealt with lockdowns and curfews during the pandemic, spending much of my time isolated with my golden retriever in Mont-Tremblant, Canada.
— I entered another toxic relationship in Montreal, which led to a difficult breakup about five months later.
— I lost my best friend, my companion, my confidant—my golden retriever, Tommy. He passed away far too soon from a heart attack at just six years old, collapsing at my feet in my mom’s kitchen as I made dinner on August 2, 2021.
— I experienced another round of health issues (more on that later).
— I began shedding people, places, activities, and things that no longer served me, including alcohol—which I stopped drinking on December 5, 2021.
— I navigated and processed difficult emotions on a daily basis—guilt, shame, doubt, fear, sadness, anxiety.
— I felt stuck and questioned my new path more times than I could count.
— Most importantly, I started shedding the layers of myself that were never truly me, beginning the journey back to my true essence.
Through all of this, I somehow held onto an unwavering belief in myself, even when doubt crept in—and for that, I’m deeply grateful.
When 2022 arrived, I made a decision—it was time to heal and rebuild.
Taking yet another leap of faith, I booked a flight to Venice, California, for a two-month trial run.
I barely knew anyone there, but something inside me said to go.
Within three days of being back in Venice, I had my answer.
I knew—deeply, unquestionably, unequivocally—that I wanted to spend the rest of my life in Southern California.
So, I did.
Stay tuned for Part Four, where I’ll share the next chapter of my story—the foray into deeper detoxification and the most transformative period of my life. Also, don’t forget to read both Part One and Part Two.